The Colouring Book Part Three: Return of the Cliches
The Ra'zac's mountain. Which actually looks kinda neat, albeit ludicrously oversized.The Star Rose Sapphire Thingy. Which just looks like... well, a rose. You really wouldn't know that thing was meant...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Four
The chapter from the last installment continues, and it occurs to me now that Axis and Azhure have so far spent at least 80% of this book going to parties and having Relationship/Baby Drama. Isn’t...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Five
The next chapter is still with Axis, unfortunately. It’s now a month later and he’s approaching Carlon, which apparently has “pink walls and [snip] silver and gold rooftops”, which are “like a...
View ArticleAnti Shirt Shirts
Hey guys!In the past we had official Antishurtugal t-shirts, but that was a looong time ago. So now, your very own Epistler has decided to bring it back! I've come up with three designs so far, and am...
View ArticleSomething Brewing...
So, Paolini's been hinting at writing a short story involving Murtagh and forks. Or a fork, anyway. Which Paolini hinted at previously as a Great Noodle Incident in murtagh's past.Do you think this is...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Six
Okay, I tried to post this a few hours ago and fuckin' LJ helpfully removed all my formatting and pictures. Then it did it again when I tried to edit. Twice. This is now my fourth attempt. I am...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Seven
With the battle over (and all the named characters still alive, naturally), Axis sends the surviving Coroleans home, telling them to tell the Emperor the deal is off and they’re not welcome in “my...
View ArticleTwilight old clip
This might be a topic which has been discussed to the point of ad nauseum but thought I'd just share an amusing clip of how Pattinson reacts to the Twilight series by...
View ArticlePao Twitter Update
One of the many counterarguments we've seen against CP's writing back in the day is "He's matured as a writer!!" while his works prove otherwise. And these few tweets never fails to surprise when you'd...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Eight
Did you know the vocals in the soundtrack to the movie Coraline don't actually contain any words? No really. To the untrained ear it sounds lke French, but in reality it's just gibberish with French...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Twenty-Nine
Gentle readers, be prepared for this chapter. This… is the chapter where Borneheld dies. And it’s going to be extremely unpleasant to read, even at second hand.Me right now, if I was good-looking.We...
View ArticleAnd We Are Live!
Well, I said I'd do it and now I have! The AS shop is now live, and its first t-shirt design has been uploaded!If you would like your own design to be added, just post it here and make sure it's big...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Thirty
So, you might be wondering, what precisely was the point of Axis crossing the Moral Event Horizon other than to provide us with some utterly gratuitous gore? Well wonder no longer, because now we get...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Thirty-One
In the next chapter, Axis “proclaim[s] Tencendor Chicken” in a grand and emotionally charged ceremony.How do I know that? Because the author says so. It literally says “Axis proclaimed Tencendor in a...
View ArticleBrisingr Spork: Chapter 44 - Butting Heads
Chapter 44: Butting HeadsEpistler: Or, as SnarkbotAnya suggested we call it, “Buttheads”. Which describes the entire cast of this novel.Anyway, this chapter now has the dubious distinction of having...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Thirty-Two
Don't worry, guys - it's nearly over now. But not before some more horror and Xtreme Sueness, unfortunately. And more of Axis being an evil monster. Naturally.In the next chapter, Axis does what he...
View ArticleThe problem with ignoring criticism:
One of the core problems with the Inheritance Cycle and a lot of other bad stories for that matter is this: Their authors refuse to take criticism. Speaking as an author on fanfiction.net, taking...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Thirty-Three
I know it's rather soon, but... I really just want to get this over with. It's time for the worst, most vile scene in this entire book, possibly the entire trilogy, and Exhibit Z (we've already covered...
View ArticleEnchanter Sporking: Part Thirty-Four - The End
Well here we are - the final installment. It's been a long 'un and now it's over, and a good time was had by none.While I was preparing this post, a very depressing thought occurred to me, which I...
View ArticleBrisingr Spork: Chapter 45 - Genealogy
In which our hero’s internal struggle is removed, because gods forbid Eragon should have to grapple with less than perfectly virtuous ancestry...We open the chapter with yet another POV shift, away...
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